Life

So no school this semester which means I have to devote myself to working. I am actually excited about that, if I could just find a job. I am going to have some very high bills for school so I need some jobs ASAP!
Yes, plural.
I have a babysitting job on Monday's from 8:30-4:30 and I might get this job I interviewed at on the weekends, Saturday 8-5 and Sunday 12-5. But now I need a job from Tuesday-Friday.
I was unpacking boxes today that were in the attic that I packed before I went to Peru and in my head I was thinking, soon I will be packing these boxes again and moving on to the next phase of my life.
I am ready for that phase.
I mean I think God has some things for me to learn before I can start it, but I am excited about it.
I need to learn about finances and living on a budget and taking care of myself so that I know I can survive on my own.
I have nothing exciting to say currently, just needed to feel my fingers hitting the keys, releasing thoughts inside my head.

Breaks my heart

I cannot believe what is happening in Haiti!
What devastating blow this morning.
After they have lost over 72,000 people and so many injured and homeless, they have the worst aftershock ever.
I think it is great that so many are helping, I only wish I could help more.
I will have to be praying for them because this is so sad.
I cannot even imagine this happening to the US, to people I know and love.
How scary and difficult it must be for the survivors!
I pray that God protects the people and that He provides for them and that they see Him in the midst of the turmoil.

3 days 23 hours 17 minutes and 40 seconds

I am excited for the weather.
But I will miss seeing my nieces and nephew everyday.
I am excited for the embraces of the kids at the orphanage.
But I will miss talking to my family everyday.
I am excited for furthering the friendships I have made with the children.
But I will miss my best friends.
I am excited for the adventure that God is taking me on.
And although I will miss so many people and things, giving a year to Go Ye Ministries will be one of the best years of my life.

A friend told me she wants to graduate but she is not looking forward to having to work everyday like I am going to have to do. I told her "But when you have your dream job it's different. Working with 40 kids everyday, loving on them and making sure they are safe and taken care of makes me feel super blessed! I know it will be stressful but I wouldn't have it any other way!" I went on to say that you "Just gotta find the right one. The one that is worth any bad that is thrown your way because all the good outweighs any bad that could possibly happen!" Because life is not always stress free. That is just how it is.
But I am so thankful and blessed for the opportunity to serve in Peru.
I am honored to be a part of the ministry and to work with all of those beautiful children.
I just hope that they can see more of Christ and less of me everyday.

Happy New Year!

I took in the New Year with great friends!
We went to church from 7-10 p.m. and had worship, testimonies, and food.
And then we watched YouTube videos until around 12:45 a.m. ha ha
And then we watched Law Abiding Citizen which is a really intense movie.
It sparked a Philosophical discussion which lasted until around 7 a.m.
Then we began to watch Inglorious Basterds but they fell asleep and I tossed and turn until 11 a.m.

It was cool to hear their hearts and beliefs, the things they were raised on and the things they knew of the Bible. It challenged me in what I believe and why I believe it and that was so good. I mean we have pretty much all of the same beliefs.

Then I came home and babysat my nieces and nephew so that Emma and Dan could go on a date to Brett and Mary's house. I am sure that it was much needed and I was happy to be there to babysit for them. They went to sleep at 8 and I watched Criminal Minds for two hours which was about different serial killers which sparked an uncomfortable feeling about going to sleep when Emma and Dan still had not returned so I watched Oprah at 11 and it was about Fantastic Families that Oprah had found out about over the years and I cried. ha ha.
The first story was about a lady who was at her church service and there were 12 Liberian orphans singing to raise money for their orphanage in Liberia that were there and while they were performing she felt the nudging of the Lord that two of these teenage boys were her sons. She and her husband already had children. After the service two of the boys went up to her and her family and hugged her and called her mom. She ended up adopting them and it started a chain reaction. Several other family friends ended up adopting some of the other boys, which sparked other families in the same community to adopt some of the children that were still in Liberia. And I am pretty sure that like 40 something kids were adopted from Liberia just from this one community of believers in Charlotte, North Carolina.
I was overwhelmed with tears because the Lord has pressed orphans upon my heart for some time now and I know that someday I will probably have the same calling upon my heart to adopt. It is a beautiful story really.

2009 was so much better than 2008. I am going to believe that 2010 is going to be even better than 2009!
I learned a lot in 2009 and found so much healing. I found friends for a lifetime and a country that I have fallen in love with. I have found children to adore and a calling to go. I am excited for the journey of 2010 and I pray God that I leave it in your hands as You guide me on this adventure in Peru.

The Bravehearted Gospel by Eric Ludy

This is one amazing and impressive book. I've had the book for many months and every time I picked it up to read, I felt so energized afterwards. It really speaks truth in such a more necessary way.
Here are some quotes:

"My point is that ardent love leads to ardent loyalty. I love Jesus. And in step with my ardent love for my King, I give up my mind, my heart, and my body for Him to define according to the pattern of His kingdom. I am exclusively His. And therefore, it is His thoughts, His ideas, and His manner that shapes me--nothing else..I made the choice long ago that if anything--no matter how true it may sound--violates the words of my King as revealed in Scripture, I will treat it as the most dangerous lie."

"To yield our minds, hearts, and bodies to anything but the truth as revealed in Scripture is to sleep with the enemy."

"Why is it that quite often the only person who gets rebuked, confronted, or called out in metrotheistic Christianity is not the sinner, but the one taking a stand against the sin?"

"If the church were half as afraid of sin as it is of legalism then she would be a perfect and holy bride without spot or wrinkle."

"The bravehearted life is a life lived where Jesus lived--a life spent on the same things Jesus spent His life on."

"He came for the destitute, the enslaved, the prostituted, the addicted, and the diseased. He came for the naked, the lonely, the suicidal, the broken, and the battered. He came for you. He came for me. He took on flesh and He dwelt among us. He was not untouched by our infirmities."

"Isaiah said that in the day of judgment God will sweep away the refuge of lies so that all who have made lies their refuge will stand naked before the One who is the Truth and who is the Light."

"Do we not realize that God's problems are by their very nature, our problems? Do we not realize that we are His body? We are His hands to serve the least, we are His might to swing His sword, we are His army to crush the jaws of the wicked and to rescue the dying from their fangs. We are His feet to leap the high wall, rush into the fray, engage the oppressor, and dart for safety with His treasure in our grip. We are His mouth to command the forces of Hell to fall back in obeisance, to preach the words of hope to the masses, and to proclaim the year of the Lord's favor."

"And when we yield our bodies to Him, He moves us to action. He loves through us, He prays through us, He become a father to the orphan through us, He rescues the oppressed through us, and He demonstrates His holiness through us. It is not us that pull off this miracle, but Christ working in us."

"When you feel the sting of God upon your conscience, that is conviction, not condemnation. When a Spirit-born message makes you squirm and your soul is sweating under the intense warmth of God's white hot searchlight, that is conviction, not condemnation. Conviction is always present when the Spirit of God comes. There is always discomfort, always a squirm within the soul, and always an uncomfortable heat that is laboring to expose an inner rebellion. But such discomfort is given, ironically, in order to save us from condemnation not bring condemnation. This comfortable heat is brought in order to rescue us, bring us hope, and give us life abundant."

Family.

This Christmas, even though I did not get to travel to see specific family members, it was great to see the family that was able to come to us. We got snowed in and enjoyed our White Christmas. We had lots of fun, playing games, taking lots of pictures, playing with the little ones and catching up with each other. And just spending more quality time together.
I don't know if it was as special and important to them as it was me.
But I caught myself appreciating it, them more.
I may not have shown it but I definitely was taking it all in.
I mean I probably won't see my family for a year.
That is a big deal.
Because even going to college, I always had at least one family member nearby.
Now I am going into a place with people who I consider family, but are not the family that I have been around for the past 23 years. I will experience all of the different holiday's differently for the first time ever, without my blood family.
So many changes are coming and they are coming so rapidly.
I am so excited, don't get me wrong.
Just noticing things differently nowadays.
Forgetting a lot of the shortcomings and focusing mainly on the fact that they are my family and I love them dearly. That and I have learned so much from them each individually. I would not be who I am today without them.
I am forever thankful for my family.
And my friends.
God has truly blessed me.

500 Days of Summer

Man, I wish someone had told me the ending to this movie because I seriously would not have seen it.
Depressing. Real. But I escape reality through movies.
I mean, Braveheart is my favorite movie. It is so sad.
But there is so much hope and so much life to it that I accept all the bad with the good.
It is just different.
But with this movie it builds up to him winning her back.
Not having a reality check and her getting married to another guy.
And then him on day 500 meeting someone else.
I mean it is true that life is not a coincidence.
And that things in life can totally change us or set us up for something else.
But I was just rooting for the two of them to be together and then BAM
She marries someone else and they never even show him.
He doesn't even get an introduction.
I don't know what bothered me so much about it.
Probably how real it was. I'm not sure.
But I really did not like it.
It was well-made and great actors.
But I don't want to ever watch it again.
I cried. Which is not really abnormal.
But it was hurting cry. A cry that I don't want to cry again.
I know I am weird. But I'm just speaking the truth.